I knew this streak of good vegan vittles was bound to come to an end. Thanks to Helen's Kitchen Vegetarian Chicken Tofu Steaks it has.
I was wandering through the freezer section of my co-op and the picture on the box looked so delicious that I just had to try it. It's been sitting in my freezer waiting for that perfect moment when I was just too tired to cook and needed good food fast. Helen offers three different ways to cook these monstrosities. In the skillet, the grill or the microwave. My first turn off was that it says in bold letters do not cook in the toaster oven. I hate the microwave and didn't feel like dragging out the the indoor grill so the skillet was my last choice.
I can't imagine how this stuff would ever cook on a grill because the second I flipped it over it began to crumble. But, it still smelled fairly promising so i just pushed all the crumbles together and kept on cooking.
I was all ready for it. I was going to have a divine "chicken" sandwich. Spelt bread, sprouts, the whole nine. I took my hot crumbled tofu and tried to get it on the bread without it completely disintegrating. I took a bite and IMMEDIATELY spit it out. I think I also made some funny noises because even my cat raised an eyebrow at me. Honestly, plain uncooked tofu straight out the package would've been better than these chicken tofu steaks. There's no way you could dress these little nuggets of horror up to make them even kind of decent.
My recommendation: STAY AWAY! STAY FAR AWAY!