Let me tell you for a fact, I will try just about anything for you guys and blog about it. I was nearly food poisoned by a bad batch of Gardein Tuscan Breast but tried them one more time only to find out that the issue had been resolved and those little cutlet’s of vegan happiness were delicious. Although the folks are Gardein were kind enough to send me samples of some of their other products (reviews to come on those soon) I got so excited after trying the Tuscan Breast that I went out and bought the crispy tenders (vegan chicken tenders) and the classic style buffalo wings.I have to admit, it was hard for me to turn my back on Boca (the brand that made me a vegetarian) to buy Gardein's crispy tenders but it was a necessary betrayal for the sake of my readers! As I sit here, writing this, thinking about the last time I took a bite of these Gardein crispy tenders I just get a warm and fuzzy feeling all over. Like little vegan nuggets dancing through my head. I’m sad to say it but those boca nuggets are a thing of the past. Gardein’s crispy tenders are AMAZING! The taste, the texture, they’re crispy and juicy and perfect in every way. And did I mention they’re only 90 calories a serving?! If there weren’t laws against women marrying soy products then I would be Mrs. Crispy Tender, but you could call me Tender for short ;)
After a great 2nd impression with Gardein’s Tuscan Breast and a phenomenal first impression with their crispy tenders I was more excited than a 13 year old girl on the opening night of Twilight New Moon to try their classic style buffalo wings. But from the moment I opened the package I knew this was going to be an awful experience. All the “wings” were clumped up together in one big ball of soy and gluten. I microwaved them for about 30 seconds to separate the wings only to realize that there was only sauce on about ½ of them and out of those half the sauce was only on half the wing. But I soldiered on. I decided to bake them, hoping that the sauce would defrost slowly and begin to coat the entire wing, but that was simply wishful thinking. There was one wing that had a decent amount of sauce on it so I decided to try it out before I added my own buffalo sauce to the rest. IT WAS DISUSTING. Awful. Horrific. I spit it out immediately. The texture was slimy and just plain strange. The sauce was like a really bad enchilada sauce. It didn’t even closely resemble a buffalo sauce let alone a classic buffalo sauce. The whole thing was just one big disaster. As I attempted to brush every speck of these disgusting wings off my tongue all I could think is “why didn’t they just add some buffalo sauce to the crispy tenders? It would’ve been so perfect!” Well, perfect as long as they didn’t use whatever buffalo sauce was on their current wings.
So the final verdict is Gardein’s Crispy Tenders – Angel!!!! Gardein’s Classic Style Buffalo Wings – Demon!!!!
LOL. You crack me up! I laughed through most of this review! Especially the "more excited than a 13 year old girl on the opening night of Twilight" Thanks for the review!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you totally! I LOVED the Crispy Tenders so much that I tried the Buffalo Wings. I so dissapointed. They were kind of mushy and slimey.
ReplyDeleteI did try the Chick'n Good Stuff last night (it's kind of like a stuffed chicken parm) and it was pretty good.
This is my first post and I also wanted to tell you I love your cookbook. :)
Oh my god, I LOVE LOVE these Crispy Tenders. I could seriously eat them every day; they're better than any soy nuggets I've ever had. So far I've only dipped them in ketchup or BBQ sauce, but I'd like to be more creative soon.
ReplyDeleteI've been a lurker for quite some time.....Your blog is AWESOME!!!
ReplyDeleteMay I ask where you got the Tenders from? Kroger, Publix, TJs, Whole Foods? I don't think I've seen them but would love to give them a try.
Also, much to my surprise, I came across your cookbook at Borders and had to get it.. I look forward to trying every recipe.
Hey Meikmeika, I've found the crispy tenders at both Kroger and Publix in the freezer section with all the other veg*n prepared foods. Lately it's been harder to find them as they sell out really quickly.
ReplyDeleteOh man, we don't have Publixes where I live but I'll be near one next week and totally want to seek out the tenders!
ReplyDeleteI felt the same way about those Crispy Tenders when I tried them the other day. I am still skeptical that they are almost, like...healthy!
ReplyDeleteI picked up a package of the Crispy Tenders the other day. I've been afraid to try them but think I'll give it a go after your review! I was going to buy the hot wings also but just knew that there was something nasty lurking inside that bag.
ReplyDeleteI'm really wondering if Gardein is still having some serious quality control issues. I'm thinking back to how you hated that first batch of one of their products and they sent you another one and you loved it. I'm wondering this because I tried the Buffalo Wings (with a lot of skepticism after reading your review), and LOOOOOOVVVVVEEED them, like crazy loved them. They weren't slimy at all, the flavor and textures were perfect, they had plenty of sauce, and weren't stuck together in a brick. And this is coming from someone who really tends to hate mock meats. They were just so delicious and spot on. I couldn't get enough, and my husband and I polished them off embarrassingly quickly. They were kind of reminiscent of McDonalds Chicken nuggets in texture (sorry for the gross comparison, but I mean that in the best way possible).
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I just wanted to say that you might just consider giving them a second chance.
Thanks Angela! I might give these another try one day but it will be a day far far from now. Just thinking of them makes my stomach hurt. If I retry them I'll definitely report back on the flavor texture.
ReplyDeleteGardein's black bean burgers taste incredible, but I've tried 2 now, and both times I've woken up at night with stomach cramps...followed by a miserable next day- if you know what I mean.
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